For 11 seasons of Modern Family, fans got to know Claire Dunphy and how she operated in every family-related situation. As the mother of three kids, a wife to Phil, and a businesswoman, Claire wore many hats and struggled to balance it all from time to time, which was a relatable part of her character.
Claire said that she had a strained relationship with her mother DeDe Pritchett and that she never wanted to be like her. But unsurprisingly, there were moments where Claire acted exactly like the woman she tried so hard to distance herself from. As much as Claire (sometimes) wanted to be the “cool mom,” her controlling nature and judgments got in the way, forcing her to be quite similar to her own distant mother.
Updated On June 24, 2022, by Lynn Gibbs: Claire Dunphy told the Modern Family cameras that she was a daddy’s girl who never got along with her mother, DeDe. According to Claire, DeDe placed judgments on her and compared their lifestyles. When Claire became a mother, DeDe wasn’t involved with her or the Dunphys as much as Jay was but it was still easy to see the mother-daughter similarities between the two whenever DeDe came into town. As much as Claire would deny it, she was more like her mother than she realized.
Claire And DeDe’s Similarities
She Meddled With Her Kids’ Love Lives
Claire and Phil got married as soon as they found out she was pregnant with Haley. Claire was very open with the fact that her dad was never a fan of Phil but came around to love him like a son. DeDe clearly had similar feelings about Phil as she invited Claire’s ex-boyfriend over for dinner in hopes of them getting back together in one episode, despite Phil and Claire being married for over a decade at that point.
Just like her mother, Claire got in between her children’s relationships far too many times. She denied Dylan from proposing to Haley when they were on vacation because Haley was still a teenager. The Dunphy also got in between Bill’s spontaneous Valentine’s Day proposal to Alex. Claire forgot that she was doing something her mother would do, but she was still one of TV’s favorite moms.
She Suppressed Alex’s Sexuality
The one thing Claire hated most about growing up with Jay and DeDe was that they tried to keep her from doing normal, healthy things that teenagers did. Claire ended up sneaking out to go to concerts and parties because her parents never trusted her. All she wanted was to be seen as a young adult and do what her friends were doing.
But when Claire became a mother, she too did what her mom did. She tried to keep Haley inside after school and was not okay with Alex’s slow transformation into a young woman. Whenever Alex tried to embrace her maturity, Claire got uncomfortable and started acting in an off-putting way. This only made Alex hide more things from her.
Her Controlling Nature Was Just Like DeDe’s
One of the first things that people noticed about Claire was her controlling nature. She was manipulative when she didn’t get her way — and not just in motherhood. Claire did some of the worst things to the family because of her control issues, even though many were well-intended.
Claire always said she didn’t want to be like her mother because of how controlling she was. Funny enough, that’s exactly what Haley, Alex, and Luke did when they wanted to do things that didn’t have Claire’s stamp of approval.
Her Daughters Were Afraid To Go To Her For Things
Claire always wanted her kids to feel comfortable going to her for advice and support. And while Haley, Alex, and Luke all had their moments, they didn’t always want to involve Claire with life’s problems.
They were afraid they would be grounded or scolded instead of heard. Haley hid her pregnancy, her impending elopement, and her failing grades from Claire until she ran out of excuses. Alex also hid her successes from Claire because she was either too over-the-top or didn’t care at all. Luke was always a daddy’s boy and that was because Phil listened and understood him more than Claire did. This was all reflective of Claire’s relationship with her mother and while it was all unintended, Claire had some toxic traits.
Claire And DeDe Both Picked Favorites
Over the years inside the Dunphy house, fans would confirm that Alex was Claire’s favorite child as they were the most alike. Alex and Claire were both brilliant, goal-oriented, and competitive. But as Haley matured, Claire seemed more comfortable and honest around her. Claire vented to Haley, drank wine with her, and talked on a different level than she ever did with Alex and Luke.
While every parent connects differently to their kids, Claire was doing what her parents did. Claire was Jay’s favorite because of their similarities and Mitchell was DeDe’s favorite because he was the ultimate people-pleaser.
Claire And DeDe’s Biggest Differences
Claire Would Never Abandon Her Family Like DeDe Did
When DeDe and Jay got divorced, the family explained that DeDe packed her things and left. Instead of staying local for the kids, DeDe moved elsewhere while trying to find herself. She did make impromptu visits to the Dunphys and Tucker-Pritchetts but those visits were always filled with stress.
If anything happened to Claire and Phil’s relationship, the last thing she would do is abandon her kids. Her goal in life was to make sure they were successful and safe, and she did just that throughout the series.
She Was Present In Her Kid’s Lives
Claire made it her mission to prove to everyone that she was a woman who could do it all. With three kids at home and a goofy husband, she was perfectly capable of running her household — and she did just that.
Claire was a likable character because she was always there when her kids got home from school and made sure they had the best birthday parties and holiday celebrations. Claire was present in her children’s lives (whether they liked it or not). Because Claire and DeDe had a tense relationship, DeDe wasn’t always there for Claire, which drove a wedge in between them.
She Dropped Everything To Help Her Kids
As likable as Claire was, some fans couldn’t stand her parenting. Some loved her techniques while others found her abrasive. But there’s one undeniable thing about Claire: at the end of the day, she loved her children. Whenever something happened, she dropped everything to help them.
She helped Luke get into college, she tried her best to understand Alex’s workload, and she showed up at Haley’s art show when she wasn’t asked. She wanted her children to succeed and showed up because she genuinely cared. DeDe, on the other hand, was never too interested in her kids’ accomplishments.
She Was An Amazing Role Model
Jay was a very honest man with old-school, traditional values. He was constantly playing catchup with his kids, grandkids, and even his wife. Between his two children, he was closest to Claire because they shared a similar personality. The two were so close that he hired and promoted Claire to CEO of Pritchett’s Closets & Blinds.
As a CEO, wife, and mother, Claire struggled at first. It was hard to juggle it all and to be present. But when she finally found her footing, Claire was Wonder Woman and an excellent role model to her kids.
She Became Her Kids’ Friends
Claire and DeDe were never friends like Claire was with her kids. They didn’t call each other regularly to catch up and Claire even unsubscribed from her mother’s weekly email. They didn’t have much in common and didn’t share the same sense of humor, even though Claire was one of Modern Family‘s funniest characters.
But when it came to friendship with her own children, Claire had a relationship she never got with her own mother. When she and the kids were on good terms, they were as close as friends.
Her Kids Knew How Much She Loved Them
When DeDe unexpectedly died, Claire was devastated because she didn’t have a good, lasting impression of her mother. Mitchell was in tears while talking about all of the sweet things he did with his mother but Claire couldn’t think of much.
That is something Haley, Alex, and Luke wouldn’t have trouble with when the time came. It was clear that Claire’s kids were her whole life and she would do anything for them. She was controlling but she always hugged and kissed her kids to make them feel loved.
About The Author
