Just in time for Valetine’s Day, crass leftist comedian Chelsea Handler starred in a The Daily Show video celebrating being “single” and “childless.” Handler then went on the attack after right-wing pundits, including Tucker Carlson and Ben Shapiro, striking a nerve with responses to her intentionally off-color video.
The 47-year-old New Jersey native, who has never been wed, extoled the joys of a single, childless life. Her triumphs include:
- Waking up early and going back to sleep
- Hooking up with random guys
- Drinking lots of wine
- Generally doing “whatever the f*ck” she wants
If you ask me, the list sounds more like the aspirations of a young adult content to live in their parents’ basement rather than a middle age success story.
— E (@ElijahSchaffer) February 16, 2023
Chelsea Handler Celebrates Single, Childless Life in The Daily Show Sketch
Right-wing personalities Tucker Carlson, Jesse Kelly, and Ben Shapiro had a similar reaction and didn’t pull their punches, sending Chelsea Handler into a tizzy.
Handler’s video titled “Day in the Life of a Childless Woman” opens with a graphic depiction of her morning self-pleasure routine since she has “no kids to take to school”.
“I wake up at 6 AM. I remember that I have no kids to take to school, so I take an edible, masturbate, and go back to sleep,” the crass comedienne seemingly brags.
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The video only went downhill from there. After going back to sleep and staying in bed until lunch, she then readies for “a busy day of doing whatever the f*ck I feel like.”
Handler takes a jab at weary parents who opt for comfortable and practical attire when running errands.
“I put on my most impractical and stylish shoes since I won’t be chasing a child around the grocery store,” Handler continues.
After that it’s a quick jaunt to “Paris to grab a croissant” and, of course, enjoying the flight since she has “no screaming kids.”
To cap it all off, the middle-age single imagines herself returning home to hook up with a random guy from a dating app. Texting the stranger, “Wanna f*ck tonight?” Because one-night stands with strange men is really the good life.
Handler seemed to decide her video wasn’t offensive enough, so she ended on a note suggesting she’s using her ample “free time” to build a time machine so that she can “kill baby Hitler.”
I think we can all agree that some comedy is funny, and some is not.
— E (@ElijahSchaffer) February 16, 2023
Tucker Carlson, Ben Shapiro Skewer Chelsea Handler
Somehow this video has massed over 8 million views on Instagram alone. Yet Handler is somehow aghast that news pundits would critique the video.
Chelsea Handler tweeted a montage of Fox News host Tucker Carlson, radio host Jesse Kelly, and Daily Wire EIC Ben Shapiro reacting to her Daily Show sketch.
— Chelsea Handler (@chelseahandler) February 16, 2023
Carlson had recently dedicated a segment to Handler’s over-the-top video. Not surprisingly, he and guest Jesse Kelly did not have many kind words for Handler.
The Fox News host called Handler an “aging, deeply unlikable woman who never had kids.”
Then Kelly took things another level suggesting the 40 something’s “womb resembles a dried-up tumbleweed blowing down an old western town” whose Valentine’s Day date “for the 10th year in a row is a 10-year-old copy of ‘Magic Mike’ and a half-full bottle of Xanax, and you are trying to pretend you are happy, but you are not happy. And it is actually not her fault. She has been lied to by a country that has lost its way.”
Handler’s decision to lump in Shapiro shows he hit a nerve. He didn’t go for the jugular like Kelly. Shapiro speculates that Hander is miserable – it’s “written all over her face how miserable she is.”
“Why would I even need my own children when I get to hear these crybabies all the time?” Handler responded.
She then directs her ire at Carlson, “Are you really upset about how much freedom I have ― or are you upset that you haven’t been able to take it away from me yet?”
True to form, Handler then took the low road. She spouted, “I think we both know that you are hate-masturbating to me, and I’m down with that.”
As for Shapiro, Handler credited him with helping her maintain her childless status.
“Thank you for helping my cause of not having children. Who needs the birth control pill when your voice is 100 percent effective?”
Of course, this is the same Chelsea Handler publicly praised Louis Farrakhan for his “powerful” rhetoric on race. Handler is Jewish, mind you. That tell us everything we need to know.
The whole thing might have been funnier if birth rates weren’t declining, and Chelsea Handler wasn’t a poster child for the erosion of family values happening in American today.
Experts attribute the decline largely to women, much like Handler, waiting until later in life to have children or not having children at all.
It’s really sad to see how loose morals are celebrated at every turn. Yet the traditional values upon which this country was built are criminalized.
If you’re curious, you can watch The Daily Show video featuring Chelsea Handler below. But remember – curiosity killed the cat!
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